YouTube Rewind 2018 was just an Experiment: YOUTUBE.

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YouTube release explanation behind worst YouTube Rewind ever. Source: YouTube

SINGAPORE, 11 December 2018: YouTube has finally broken the silence on YouTube Rewind 2018.

Launched on 6 December, YouTube Rewind 2018 has soared to the 2nd spot on the most-disliked videos of all time, and is on track to take over the top spot, currently held by Justin Bieber’s Baby music video.

YouTube admitted that he had concocted a whole rile-the-fans scheme as a “social experiment”. YouTube decided to irritate the fans of YouTube content creators, as he wanted to see “how far they [YouTube content creators’ fans] would go” for their idols.

While some content creators’ fans replied that they wouldn’t have done such a thing(7.9M dislikes), others were celebrating the fact that YouTube video was such harshly disliked.

When asked why YouTube would call it “Everyone Controls Rewind” without actually listening to much of its fan base, YouTube explained that he’s not here to teach us how to live our lives, but rather, wanted the experiment to serve as a “thinking point” and “conversation starter”.

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UNAWARE: Upwards of 85% of SAF Positions Occupied by Men.

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Singapore is a first-world nation and economy, so why does she still have a third-world mindset? (source)

SINGAPORE 26 NOVEMBER 2018: More than 85% of positions in the Singapore Armed Forces (SAF) are still occupied by men, a study conducted by Unbiased National Association of Women for Action and Research (UNAWARE) announced.

Citing a study of a quip from a random SAF enlistee PTE Wong Oak: “I everytime in camp only can see men. Where are the women? It’s (end) 2018 people, come on lah! Can you wake up your idea?”

W. Oak added: “The glass ceiling is, sadly, alive and well. According to the Singapore Board of Directors Survey 2015, 93% of respondents relied on “personal contacts” when looking for board candidates – in other words, relying on the “old boys’ network” which systematically excludes women.”

“Much more can be done to address and eradicate the perceptions, biases and structures that are still in place which limit women’s choices and opportunities.” W. Oak said.

TMT reached out to SAF for comments, and was promptly told “eh fuck you understand you nahbay chao jibye.” and “you think u funny mickey mouse fun fair is it? Go and sign 3.”

3 Tips to Remember for Safe Hiking

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With the recent hiking incident in Malaysia where 2 Singaporeans were stranded for days, here are 3 top tips to remember when hiking to avoid getting into unfortunate situations.

 

1. Don’t go hiking

Hiking may seem like a nice way to exercise while enjoying the outdoors, but is it worth the risk? Staying home will ensure you never step off the beaten path or make it hard for rescuers to find you. Keep this tip in mind the next time you decide to go for a walk in the jungle.

 

2. Bring a NSF/NSman officer along

Everybody knows that because someone went through an officer cadet course they are instantly above everyone else. With the incessant, unending whines from them, you’ll know every single detail about how tough it was when they took their jungle confidence course. As much as it is a pain being around them, you know that when you get lost you can rely on them to get you out of the jungle because they saw some bird die in Thailand and had to eat it.

 

3. Go to Jurong instead

Let’s face it; Jurong is basically Malaysia. With all of it’s foreign-ness and disconnection, Jurong might as well be Malaysia. With the insanity of putting 3 malls around 1 MRT station, there’s plenty to explore in the area.

 

Lose Your Dinner in Person, With foodpanda starvation!

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You can now wait 2 hours for your food to not be delivered to you at foodpanda’s physical outlet, foodpanad starvation!

Foodies rejoice! With foodpanda starvation, you can now have the authentic experience of foodpanda’s habitual terrible service and no-show, but in the atmosphere of an upscale restaurant! Chic!

“It’s just like when I order from foodpanda at home, where the food comes 2 hours late and customer support is non-existent, but now at a restaurant!” quipped Sua Khoo, a frequent foodpanda customer. “When the food finally arrived 110 minutes after ordering, I was extra hungry which made the cold, misshapen meal seem extra delicious.”

foodpanda starvation comes in response to competitor Deliveroo’s Deliveroo Editions. foodpanda starvation will feature a restaurant dining experience but still retain the amazing lack of customer service and satisfaction that foodpanda is famous for, all in a central location.

“I tried raising the issue of my food being delayed for 90 minutes with the waiter, when he rolled his eyes at me and walked away” another excited diner squealed. “This feels JUST like ordering foodpanda at home, but in a fancy restaurant setting.” She added.

 

Heroes of the Storm Earns HPB Healthier Choice Recommendation Over Dota 2 Due to Salt Content.

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Heroes of the Storm dubbed healthier over Dota 2 due to salt levels.

The Singapore Health Promotion Board (HPB) has earned the Healthier Choice label over fellow Multiplayer online battle arena (MOBA) title Dota 2.

“The salt content in Dota 2 is at extremely unhealthy levels and should be taken in moderation.” Said Mr. Kiam, spokesman of HPB. “When consumed in excessive quantities, Dota 2 players may face health complications such as kidney failure due to extreme salt intake. Severe cases may even develop into cancer” added Mr. Kiam.

“Heroes of the Storm is a much healthier alternative, and provides similar levels of entertainment, albeit less intense.” Mr. Kiam said at a press event.

Closing off with some advice, Mr. Kiam said that in addition to considering alternatives, players can consider “git gud” to avoid negative health implications.

Circles.Life Forsees Rebranding to ‘Foreign’ Brand Squares.Souls in Q3 2018.

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Circles.Life has announced that it forsees a “foreign” brand buy-in by mysterious Squares.Soul in Q3 of 2018.

“We are very excited.” quipped Ms. Ai Mai, Circles.Life representative. “Circles.Life is extremely hip and up-to-date. We forsee an unannounced dip in profits in 2018 and a sudden re-brand that will really shape up the brand.”

Following in the recent footsteps of Gong Cha and Llao Llao in Singapore, Circles.Life foresees a change in branding toward a “third-party” takeover.

“We can foresee that mobile services will remain the same. We will no longer be a pointless company.” reported Ms. Mai. “The foreseen rebrand will be edgier and well-balanced.”

Ms. Mai ended the media event saying that other telcos should be ready to “square up.”